Narcissistic spectrum

Hi, I start to examine myself and start to see sometimes I can think about others, what others want from me and how to act according to nature, and sometimes I think about myself, especially I do not feel understood and I feel insecure.

I thought being insecure is bad. However, I cannot help being insecure sometimes when associate with others who do not listen to me, or think about how I feel. It is not only my problem, but the other way around. 

I realized that it is the essence of human relationships.

The greatest feeling from relationships can come from mutual understanding between people.

People admit their differences and uniqueness each other and corroborating with others.

I think this is deeply ingrained as a social animal.

To focus on yourself, or others. The answer is quite easy, right?

It sometimes happens naturally, but it starts from trying to understand another person's perspective, empathy.

The habit 5 of Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is first to seek to understand then to be understand.

You need to be proactive and have initiative to make the first move if you want to influence others. If you live by yourself you will not need empathy. However, we are social animals and need to try to understand other people.

Even though other people have similar human nature, emotion, will to live, you have to be careful they are not YOU.

Each of us has different psychological make-ups and feel and think and take things differently.

We tend to use the same strategy again and again against others.

Even though they are different and constantly changing.

If we take initiative, we have to think about a very unique strategies to deal with each because everyone is unique.

Do not try to use the same strategies from books or others ideas.
Read books to learn about something that may be used, but never think this as an universal laws.

There is nothing correct principle for nature. it is constantly changing.

Immersed in the reality.

For the final word,I have learned that I have to be careful about self reliance and empathy.

Self reliance means that you do not need others in living. It is very important. We have to be independent physically, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, financially. We have to have our own ideas and be truthful to myself.

However, it is very different in social situation. In working with people or dealing with people, we have to think about others on what they need or what they want.

We cannot say anything like bad words, saying anything we want, doing something that is unacceptable to others.

The balance is very important. Do not do things I hate even though others are doing.

This is how to be an social animal.

Wow, I realized that what I am writing is exactly what Steven R.Covey says Emotional Bank Account.

I think 7 habits of highly effective people is fucking great.

I need to practice that.